The Big Bad Wolf Says...

Happy Halloween

And also...

Boo!

Lots of pictures to come of our weekend. We went to the pumpkin patch, an costume birthday party and Thriller/the Halloween parade. On the way home from the parade, in true Halloween fashion, Henry went all Excorcist and threw up all over his car seat. Then all over himself and me and the bed another five times during the night. It was so pitiful. And horrifying. He seems much better today. Thank goodness. It was our first experience with throw up. Not something I care to repeat anytime soon.

Catching Up

So I have been itching to blog. To REALLY blog. To talk about important things and be funny or moving or...something. To get away from posting picture after picture and actually write. But today, on a day I am finally caught up on the pictures of our lives, I am drawing a blank. I can think of nothing worth writing. I keep starting, then scrapping it. Not enough details, not interesting enough, not really blog worthy. So...do you see where this is going...now that I am out of pictures, I bring you bullets!

• I am still on my reading kick. I cannot read a book fast enough. Right now I am reading South of Broad, and you all, it is wonderful. Just wonderful. You should all read it. Don't give up on it, it takes about 75 pages to get interesting.
  
• A guy at work, seeing how much I like to read, brought in a bunch of hard back books his mom was going to donate to the library. He said I could have my pick of them. Is it wrong that the first thing I thought was, "Man...These could bring some money on ebay..."
• For the record, I only took four. Three I want to read, one I already read and loved so much I would like to add it to my book collection. The keeper was The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, if you were curious.
• We are officially having our new heating and air systems installed today. Do you know how painful it is to write a check for nearly $7000 for air. It hurts, I tell you. It hurts bad.
• In a related bullet, it was cold last night. I am ready to regain temperature control of my house. Screw you mother nature, I will retake control.
• We went and saw the movie RED for our anniversary. It was enjoyable. But it was the first movie we have been to in ages, so it is possible we just liked being out of the house.
• Speaking of movies, have you seen the new Harry Potter trailer? I am so excited you all. So, so excited.
  
• I feel like I should have things to write about trying to have a baby, but I don't. We want another baby. We really hope we can have one. We really hope we don't have to spend money. I think about it all the time, but not in a coherent writable way. But still, the thoughts, they are consuming.
  
• Last night we watched The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown, and when the Charlie Brown music came on, Henry started dancing. It was the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life.
• For some unknown reason, I actually thought the Great Pumpkin came at the end and gave Linus presents. It was sorta sad when he didn't show.
• Lucy is a real bitch.
• I don't think I have ever actually watched The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown before last night.
  
• We are still having sleeping issues. I don't think they will ever go away. I have accepted it.
• Nick got a splinter the length of a penny stuck in his finger last night. It was so horrible it still makes my skin crawl when I think about him pulling it out. *shudder*
  
• Tomorrow night our city is closing down Main Street and allowing a ton of people dressed up as zombies to do the thriller dance down the street. We are going and taking Henry. Should be fun.
• I am a little over excited about taking Henry trick or treating. He is so cute in his costume and I want to show him off, which means I am sure he will have a fit and we will only make it to one house.
• I hope he knows he has to share his candy.
  

Okay you all. I am going to stop. Sorry this is bullets. Sorry I am lame. Please come back and read again soon. I may have pictures...

Flag Football

I was about to make some crazy promise like this will be the last picture post for at least a few weeks, but then I remembered that Halloween is this weekend. So...this is the last picture post until I take some more pictures. Maybe I can at least squeeze in one meaningful post between now and then. Anyway, we celebrated Nick's best friend Ryan's birthday this past weekend. They rented a shelter at one of our local parks and we all got together to grill out and play flag football. You all, it was so much fun. I mean, I never actually caught the ball or anything, but I felt like I was a vital part of my team. Here are a few pictures from the weekend!

The birthday boy with Arielle and Cici

Me and Nick on a break from football. I was so sore the next day. And it was just touch football. But all the running...my legs aren't use to such abuse.

The boys. These four have been best friends since high school or longer. I love it.

The girls (and Henry too!)

Boo, Chris and little Cici

Aunt Candice and Henry

Someone loved the water pump

Someone also thought he had the game of corn hole all figured out.

Missy and Candice

Arielle and Henry enjoying the music

Cici and Rhi watching everyone play football. Due to injury, Rhi had to red shirt for the game.

Football. I am an athletic phenom, as you can tell by my running form.

This picture cracks me up. Nick trying to take down Arielle. She isn't going down without a fight

So that's it. Our day of fun at Ryan's birthday. It was really nice to get together with everyone and actually be sorta active and play outside. Maybe we should do it more often...

Thirty-Something...and still a Nerd

Today I am thirty one. Which...honestly is really strange. Because I would swear I was only 26, 27 tops. But if you do the math, I am indeed 31. I have work today and class tonight, so we celebrated my birthday with my family last night. It was awesome. My mom made a delicious dinner and we had a Heath bar cake. And I got some awesome gifts. So awesome in fact, I am going to share them with you now. Just to highlight that at 31, I am still a total and complete nerd.

We will start with the little less nerdy and a little more awesome. Boo got me some gray chucks that I have been dying for. I wore converse all through high school, and I am so sad that my little maroon pair that I loved most of all have been lost in time. So I got my new gray pair, and I will wear them until the fall apart. Being that my sister is awesome, she also got Henry his own pair too. So we can be all matchy. And they are high tops. Awesome.

My next present...well...it came in this gift bag. Because...you know...it's funny. And a joke...and...Oh okay fine. Because Missy knew I would love it. Inside the bag was the audio book of The Hunger Games, which I am ridiculously excited about. Because if it is a young adult novel, I am going to become obsessed with it.

Then my husband...oh he got me this. That's right. It's an Enchantment Under the Sea Dance t-shirt. You know...from Back to the Future. What? You didn't know? Because you aren't a total nerd like us? Well, that is so sad for you. And now I am sure you are like, well...that's fine, but it isn't like she will wear it out of the house...WRONG!

It's my birthday and I will wear what I want to. But I have it on with my chucks...and my jean jacket. So I am going for...sort of a... Oh, never mind. I am a nerd. Henry is going to be so embarrassed by me when he gets older.

Happy Birthday to me!

**My sweet parents didn't get me a nerdy gift at all. They gave me money to get a camera I am dying for, but at the last minute I decided it is smarter to keep the cash in savings and put it toward the FET at the beginning of the year. But taking a picture of cash seemed a little silly. But I am very excited about it, and very thankful!**

**Have you noticed how many pictures I have posted lately? Good lord, It is all pictures all the time here. One of these days I will post more meaningful words. But not tomorrow. Tomorrow there are more pictures from our weekend. But soon, I promise.**

Cousins

Henry says: It's about time they got some pictures of us together. I mean, we spend nearly every single day hanging out. What is wrong with these people?
Cici says: No joke. I was about to get angry here.

Henry: I think they want us to look at the camera, but I am not going to do it. So...whatcha been doin'?
Cici: Oh, you know...laying around. Getting some sleep. Same old, same old.

Henry: Hey, what happens if I poke you right here...
Cici: I don't think that's a good idea... never poke a baby who just finished a bottle.
Henry: Right.

Henry: I will just keep my hands to myself then...
Cici: Better.

Henry: Why are they making so much noise over there?!?!
Cici: Just look at the camera for a second. It will make them happy.
Henry: Parents. They sure are a lot of trouble.

Arielle's Shower

Thank you all so much for the anniversary well wishes and your support on the baby #2 front. You all are great. Now, we have another big weekend coming up that will inevitably lead to lots of pictures, and I have yet to post pictures from LAST weekend, so lets do this!

Last Sunday I hosted a bridal shower for my good friend Arielle. Arielle is marrying Ryan, who has been Nick's best friend since elementary school. We are so excited about the wedding! They are clearly perfect together. We played Couples Twenty Questions at the shower (best bridal shower game ever), and Arielle actually knew that if Ryan could be any superhero, he would choose the Green Lantern. That sort of knowledge clearly means soul mates. Although Ryan did think Arielle's favorite food was apples, which she found a horrifying choice. (the correct answer was dark chocolate). Now he knows the truth, so I feel I have brought them even closer together before the nuptials. My work here is done.

Anyway, the shower was a ton of fun and a hug success. Here are a couple of pictures of the event.

Here is the bride to be hanging out with sweet Cici

Me and Arielle. I must say I am not a fan of this picture, seeing as how I look like a gigantic beast, but it is the only picture I am actually in, so it gets included in the post.

Arielle with her soon to be Mother in Law

Charing and Morgan loving on sweet Cici

Rhiannon and Candice hanging out before presents are opened

Arielle with her work friends (alas, I forgot their names)

Another one with Cici, just because she looks so adorable with her Mama

The spread

Mmmmmm Shower Cake (next I would have some pictures of present opening...but I didn't take any. But trust me, she got gifts. and they were lovely)

Did you all know that some people save tissue paper from presents? And they get a little crazy if they see you just stuffing it all into a trash bag? And they pull it out and PRESS it flat and take it home. Like a party favor. Well, it's true. These are my friends.

The shower was a huge hit. And completely exhausting, according to Cici.

Four Years, ICLW and Back on the TTC Band Wagon

Four years ago today I married my very best friend. We have been through a lot in these four years, but it was always better because we were together. Over the last few years I have posted the video I made of some picture of our wedding day on our anniversary, but I am thinking you all may be a little tired of that. What? You aren't tired of it at all? You LOVE watching a video of random snapshots set to music? Well, IF YOU INSIST!

Sarah and Nick's Wedding from Sarah on Vimeo.

Next year I promise to make a new video of our actual time as a married couple. That will be fun. My only regret about this video is that I didn't have the professional pictures yet when I made it. They are so much better than these. Oh well. Happy Anniversary to us! Henry is off to Nanny and Papaw's for the night and we are going on an honest to god DATE NIGHT! It is going to be so awesome.

Also, today is the start of ICLW. Last month was my first time jumping on the ICLW band waggon, and you all...I LOVED IT! Who wouldn't? People come and leave you a million comments, and you get to read a ton of fabulous blogs you never would have found otherwise. So if you are here from ICLW, Welcome! You can see our TTC history here.

The only thing to add to that time line is that we have recently decided to start trying for a baby on our own for three months before we go back to the RE at the beginning of the year. This is actually the first I have mentioned of it on here...because somehow trying at home feels more personal... And I just felt like if I told you all, I would get my hopes up too high, so I kept it quite. I wrote a post to tell you, but it is still in my draft box. Waiting for the right moment, which never seemed to come. I thought it was the best decision to just stay silent. But then as we rolled into our two week wait, my hopes got SO HIGH anyway, and I had full fledged convinced myself I was pregnant and was planning how to tell you all. It was going to be all like, "SURPRISE!!!" but then I took a test yesterday and there it was, a blaring negative. And it all came crashing back down on me. The heart break, the insecurity, the embarrassment that I had actually let myself believe it was possible for this very infertile couple to just turn up pregnant.

So...I decided to go ahead and let you all in. We are trying again. Just for a couple more months, but we just had to know if it could be that easy. No money, no hormones, just pregnant. I have struggled with the idea of our embryos. Struggled a lot, but I have prayed about it and really think that whatever is suppose to happen will happen. So here we are. Back in the land of two week waits and searching for signs. Maybe this will be our month, but I am not betting on it. It's just worth a shot.

Do You Think....

We have a good enough act to be the next Dooce and Chuck?

Becuase, I mean, this is pretty impressive. Even if Henry isn't a dog.

Henry says, "Mama, be serious, OF COURSE we are going to be famous with this act! Now I need to concentrate on my craft. This is very serious work!"

"Oh Mama, you made me laugh..."

Keeneland

Last weekend we went out to Keeneland for Nick's mom's birthday and we had such a great time! We just love it out there. For those people not from around here, Keeneland is a horse racing track that only opens six weeks out of the year. Three in the spring, and three in the fall. Keeneland is a big deal in our city. Horses are a big deal. It's just part of living in Kentucky. So... we packed up and headed out for a day at the races!

The family all ready to head in

Walking around the track for the first time (on his own feet. We took him last year, but he was too little to be interested in anything)

Lovely horse who is most likely also very fast. (If we bet on this horse, it lost. We have terrible luck...maybe because we have no idea what we are doing)

Henry thought the horses were okay, but was much more interested in that bush right in front of him

But then the horses actually came up and let Henry pet them. This was awesome.

Nana at the races for her birthday. (Nick and Grandpa not photographed) It looks really empty around us, but that is because we were super early. It got PACKED over the next hour.

So Nana may be talking in this picture, but look how cute it is of Nick, Candice and Henry! I figure a little talking shouldn't get in the way of such a great family photo :)

Walking with his Nana before the races start

Getting ready for the first race.

Henry watching his first real horse race with his Papa. Yes, that is a nacho in his hands. We know how to class up a day at the races.

Better

Thank you guys. Your comments and emails were so sweet and really did make me feel much better. I was exhausted on Tuesday. I had been up late studying (I got an A on my midterm!) and went to bed a ball of stress. I woke up the same way, and sat down and wrote that post. Later that day I went home for lunch and Henry was so happy to see me. He grabbed on to my neck and wouldn't let go, giving me the sweetest and most needed hug. He then sat it my lap as I ate, crying if I tried to put him down. It's amazing how much better he made me feel.

Yesterday Henry and I took a much needed break. I rearranged our schedule a little so we could stay at the house and get stuff done for most of the day, and you all, it was wonderful. I cleaned and he played, we played together, we took a nice log nap together. It was exactly what I needed. Exactly. I am back to it today, but I feel better. Much less thin. Thanks again for all of your kind words.

Thin

I feel overly emotional this morning. Maybe I am stretching myself a little thin these days. I don't know, it's a busy time. We have been traveling and very busy the last three weekends. I have been working so hard on my graduate class and have my midterm today. I am planning a wedding shower and making dinner for someone at work this week. Over the next few weeks we have the pumpkin patch, the wedding shower, our anniversary, several birthdays, Halloween, the bachelorette party and of course the wedding (which we are SO excited about) coming up. We are trying to finish up the addition, hanging dry wall and planning to paint. We need to get the furnace replaced in the next couple of weeks as the temperature drops. And then add in that my cousin is going through a hard time right now and I am trying my best to be there for her as much as I can. And then of course the biggie. The stress of Missy's cancer, her starting her treatments, that they may be doing chemo after all. and I am just thin. Emotionally thin.

And then there is the fact that Henry is going through a phase where he doesn't want me to hold him. Not doesn't want to be held, just doesn't want me. And I am embarrassed to admit that it hurts my feelings. It's not always. Of course he lets me hold him some, lots even. But it seems that if he has other options, like Nick or his grandma's, he wants them. And I hate to even write it on here, because I don't want them to feel bad, and they shouldn't. I love that he loves them so. But in my selfish heart I want him to love me best. Always. I feel this desire to say, "I carried you for nine months!" but I know that is pointless. He is 17 months old, and he loves his family. It's a wonderful thing.

But then I worry that my stretching myself so thin is taking a toll on Henry too. Does he feel I am gone too much. We have our Wednesdays together when I am off work and it is just us, but those days are filled with a million little jobs. Cleaning and cooking, grocery and bank. Will he say when he grows up that what he remembers from his childhood is his mama always being too busy to stop and play? That others made time, but Mama had too much to do.

See. Over emotional. But yet, it's these thoughts and all the worries for my family that keep me up until one or two in the morning when I am so exhausted from a long day. It's these thoughts that make me want to crawl into his room, scoop him up and bring him back to bed with me. But I can't. Because it's time again for me to get up, silent as a mouse, and sneak out of the house while he sleeps. To start another day of work away from my baby.

Thin.

Walk Ahead 5K

We did it! The 5K was yesterday and I am very proud to report that we all made it to the finish line. The team of Melissa's Magnificent 10 became Melissa's Magnificent 43 and was the top fund raising team in the race, bringing in over 9 Thousand dollars! Thank you all so much for your donations to this amazing cause. They will keep the donation pages active until November 1st, so I will leave the button on my sidebar up until then. After that time, if you would like to make a donation to the University of Cincinnati's Brain Tumor Research department you can contact me and I will pass on their information.

The race was a huge success all around. The organizers were expecting 200 participants in the race and were hoping to raise $60,000. They ended up with 1600 participants and raised $138,000. The race course was amazingly beautiful, Starting in Newport, Kentucky, taking us over the Purple People bridge and ending on the river in Cincinnati. Nick and I decided at the last minute to actually run part of the race, and that was fun! We maybe ran 20%... but considering we did no training we thought that was pretty good. We ran the entire portion in KY :). Here are a few pictures from our day. Thanks again for all of your support. I can't tell you how much it meant to our entire family.

Some of Melissa's Magnificent 43! (look how tall Nick looks!)

Family. Yes, I do have on a tank top. I had a jacket over it, but you all, it was so freaking hot. Like 90 degrees hot. But very beautiful!

Sisters

Cici was very excited about her first 5K

Missy and Ashley, who is her great friend who told us about the race and got us all involved!

Me and Nick

Mom and Missy. Adorable

Mom and her girls (yes, we took a lot of pictures before the race. What? We like pictures! Who needs to mess with stretching before a race??)

Crossing into Cincinnati on the Purple People Bridge. Obviously we were very serious about our finish time, seeing as how we stopped for a quick photograph.

Missy with some of her girlfriends who came in from Columbus, Louisville and Chicago to be apart of the race!

Finish! (which oddly enough, was not the same place as the start. So after the race we had to walk another mile to our car. Not the best plan, but the entire walk was so beautiful that we didn't mind!)